I know that I do not stay on here as often as I should.  Myself and my poetry have been more absent than not.  I will say that it is not without good reason.  And the following is not only explanation but my release...

I would like to introduce you to my mom.  I am her only child.  My mom has stood by me through all of my ignorance.  She has accepted me as a troubled teen who insisted on permanently moving out on my own at 15, a pregnant teen, a married woman, a divorced woman, a struggling single mother, a lost soul, a big dreamer, an ever-changing career woman, and now, a non traditional college student.  My mother has no patience with ignorance, rudeness, that project she just has to finish but my mom has all the patience in the world for me, my son, her husband, extended family and anyone she has ever met who needed an ear.  My mom has made every effort to be involved in and explore many of the things that I have taken an interest in.  My mom does yoga with me.  My mom practices yoga breathing with me.  We are total yoga armatures but we try and we find our own interpretations of our centers.  My mom reads the insane number of books that I pass along to her after I have read them.  When I recently became fascinated with taking photos, my mom drove me all over the state for no other reason than to allow me to look, without having to drive, for those shots that I just had to capture.  When I decided I wanted to hunt for old fashioned tin signs for my kitchen, my mom went on the antique shop hunt with me trying to find just exactly the signs I wanted.  When my humor columns are published in the local newspaper, my mom is clipping them and saving them.  I am studying Spanish in college.  Mom is occassionally working with Rosetta Stone for no other reason than to understand the difficulty of learning a new language and trying to speak a bit with me.  My mom takes out ads in the local newspaper when I star in a community play, make the dean's list, am accepted in a national honor society.  My mom goes on vacations with me when I ask.  I am an Army Mom and I am insanely proud of that and now my mom is an Army Nana (grandma) and as insanely proud as I am.  My mom fascinates everyone she meets.  My mom puts others needs before her own.  When I'm taking 15 credit hours in college, running to honor society service projects and trying to keep track of my Army son, my mom is sneaking into my house and cleaning and doing laundry for me because, "You need a little help.  You are working hard and this will save you time to relax this weekend".  My mom is an optimist, an extroverted introvert, an artistic soul, and my biggest fan.  And now, my mom is the victim of cancer.  Now, my mom is fighting the battle of her life.  Now, my mom does not know what her options are, what her prognosis is, how much time she may or may not have left on this Earth between all the surgeries, tests, CAT scans, PET scans and the list goes on.  She will know soon ALL of what she is dealing with and during this time...I will save all of her get well cards, save all the copies of her test results, aim my camera at her just a little more often.  When chemo comes, if she loses her hair, I have made a pact with my mom that I will shave my head and we will share wigs and occasionally proudly sport our G.I. Jane Do's all around town.

This world has been a better place for having my mom trod upon it's soil and I only hope that she will continue to honor us all with her presence.

 

The Sin

By: Lisa R.

Demure, controlled, serene, composed, perfectly at ease,

           Portrayed on canvas, all soft peachy glowing skin.

Flowing strands lifting and drifting upon a subtle imagined breeze,

           Broad strokes, coarse bristled sable captures sin,

Warm, sultry, chocolate cocoa, burnt about the edges, flecked...

           With gold, ensconcing perceptive pupils, onyx black,

Faintest hints, crinkles gathered, some long forgotten disrespect,

            Feathering, once fluttering lashes, in reveal swept back,

Satin smooth, high boned, youthful blush, elegance, refined,

           Canvas within a canvas, expressions contained, content,

Linear, centered, flared in impatience, regal, perfectly aligned,

           Capturing, imagined orchids, sweet gardenias, scent,

          

Curving smirk, plump lips, wordless smooth, soundless sigh,

           Slightly parted, glimpse of ivory white teeth,

A strong yet soft jutting, pride-exuding chin, set tilted high,

           Symbolic, silent judgment of the patron beneath,

"What of the sin?" you say, "Captured beauty this, no sin in sight"

           In whom does the sin reside?  You see not sin, in you,

In the hand that wield the sable brush, portraying her outer light,

           Layer upon layer of paint on canvas, only to eschew,

"Eschew what?" you ask, "Is this not the face he looked upon?"

           Ahhh, so you do comprehend!  You see the sin after all!

"Comprehend?  I see a most beautiful creature perched in a salon."

           You gaze upon a vision.  You gaze upon the subjects fall.

You hold equal share in the artist's sin!  You look upon her surface,

           You see her outer shell; you buy into the sad world's ideal,

Like most, you see only miniscule orts of her beauty, her grace,

           "This creature's beauty could not have eclipsed the artist's reveal!"

The sin, the sin, a bauble beneath glass, all gaze upon it, none touch,

           All breath-taking captivation, guarding the true treasure,

This ‘creature', as you say, pleasing vision, aesthetic, and the such,

           Was a vessel, a stronghold, fortress of unshared pleasure,

A soul, dear patron and artist alike!  A soul of immeasurable, rapt

           Depth, contemplations, unconditional love, respect, heart!

A mind, dear patron and artist alike!  A mind so sharp, yet trapped,

           Discounted, ignored, overshadowed, symbolized by this art.

The sin is yours, his, ours, theirs, the sin is complex yet painfully plain,

           The sin is in the painted hair, eyes, nose, chin, high cheekbone,

The sin is surface, radiated, superficial, contagious, perpetuated pain,

           The sin is simple, for you see, she sat and died...alone.

          

          

 

I chose to pursue teaching as a career because it has always been my dream.
The people in my life who have inspired me most have always been teachers.  My
desire is to inspire students as my teachers inspired me.  I am a
non-traditional student and have finally come to my opportunity to complete my
education.  As a high school student, I faced many of the personal obstacles
that students today continue to face.  I have a unique understanding of those
obstacles and this knowledge has instilled in me the importance of our youth
receiving every opportunity and advantage in receiving and continuing their
education.  It will be my goal as an educator to inspire each and every
student I contact to utilize their educational opportunities to their fullest
potential.

My career choices to this point in life have all involved some element of
educating others and this is my opportunity to move literally into the
classroom.   I have enjoyed many workplace positions that have involved
management and training.  I have developed sales training seminars and
programs for educating employees on their benefits programs.  I also worked in
the insurance field and educated individuals on how best to protect their
families in the event of disability.  Additionally, I have worked as a
paraprofessional in a school in Florida and had the opportunity to work
directing with students on a daily basis.  I assisted in the morning
kindergarten reading block, the library classes for students K-5 and designed
and taught afternoon reading and language arts lessons for the fourth and
fifth grade emotionally handicapped class.  I also filled in as a substitute
when needed.  That position was the most fulfilling and rewarding position I
have ever held.  It reinforced my desire and goal in becoming a teacher. 

My values have a strong root in education.  I truly value every possible
educational opportunity.   I am constantly reading, watching documentaries and
educational programs and engaging in conversations with people who have great
knowledge about areas I am interested in to further my knowledge base.  I
firmly believe that no individual ever truly stops learning.  I anticipate
learning nearly as much from my students as they learn from me.  I also value
our youth.  The youth of today will be the decision makers of tomorrow and
they deserve every opportunity to learn to make informed decisions for their
future.  Additionally, they deserve respect for their position.  So many
people get caught up in what's happening today and consider our youth a
nuisance or a necessity without considering the people they are disrespecting
today will be making decisions for them tomorrow.  I suppose that leads into
my ethics.  I believe that respect is key in all relationships.  Most who are
given respect generally give respect in return.  This is also true for
students.  It is my belief that if students' ideas are considered and
addressed with respect for their opinions and feelings they are more likely to
give that respect to others.  I believe that my patience and creativity will
be key traits in my role as an educator.

I wrote this poem for an assignment in a British Literature class.  The assignment was to observe nature and attempt to write about it in the way of the Romantics.  First, I thought, "Hmmmm, write a poem mimicing world renowned dead poets.  No stress there!"  <insert much sarcasm here>  Then, I thought this was a fantastic opportunity to try something new and to really commune with nature!  So, the following was the result. 

Preface:  I know this sounds bleak but the idea is that we should all strive to be the romantic sitting on the shore.  We should all understand that our little bit of uncaring action has a ripple effect and spreads out from person to person and community to community.  Consider it a lesson, not a negative work.  It has its points on modern humanities relationship with nature but it's also a statement on much more.  I would love to see comments on this.  I promise to respond and supply answers to any questions.  Enjoy....

 

Upon the gritty, stony shore I perched in earnest contemplation,

           And lobbing a pebble amid the bluish green liquid serenity-

I marveled in my simple yet blissful discovery with elation, 

           At rings and waves echoing out onto the once peaceful lake.

My marveling echoed out first in ripples then in waves from one small stone,

           Across a small divide to yet another shore but crowded,

Baring witness to my innocent disruption yet not, as I, alone,

           Majestic trees in disarray standing audience to the lake, 

Not alone but entangled in a universally dependent embrace,

           Lake, shore, crawling groundcover, trees and mountainside,

Intertwined; mothers, fathers, siblings, lovers with delicate grace

           Interconnecting, supporting, sustaining, and balancing needs.

From that near shore, nature's majesty replies to me,

           A message in that rebounding ripple ebbing back

Across the small divide received with awe and glee,

           "Thank you.  Admiration lovingly accepted."

So on this welcome, my contemplations circle and return,

           Back to the tiny ripple's growth as it lazily journeys beyond,

Beyond that nearby most inviting shore, what will it learn?

           From a tiny pebble's ripple grows a wave rolling out,

Out into the vastness of the lake carrying my message of innocent awe,

           Rolling, roiling, casting to and fro reaching for a distant shore,

I sit in silence patiently basking in the reflection of nature's law,

           I wait pondering.  "What great and wondrous message will return?"

Upon a far away wave, I spy a ribbon rainbow colored in the sun,

           In the joy of anticipation to pass the time I ruminate...

"Surely the colors must signify some luminous natures pun,

           Tales of some yet discovered flower upon the distant shore,

A reward for my admiration carried so far back across this lake."

           On its approach the ribbons form does change,

Wonder gives way to fear for the ribbon now appears a snake!

           A rainbowed slithering snake carried on that replying wave!

          

Scrambling back from water's edge I shudder in fear,

           The wave crashes to shore in vengeful spite,

Receding rudely back but message left with me, here,

           No longer slithering but coiled in a puddle ashore,

Edging forward for a better view of the coiled beast,

           I deciphered what hate filled message was returned

And stood in horror as it was what I expected least,

           Not nature's snake but a putrid rainbowed puddle stood reflecting,

Played on the surface not a message from but of nature, a nightmarish tale,

           Great growling beasts forging their attack against the brethren,

Of that nearby friendly awe-inspiring shore, as I witnessed I grew pale,

           At the sight of the horrors played out in that diseased puddle.

Beasts of metal growling, bellowing noxious fumes amid the trees,

           Frighteningly powerful claws ripping at the mountains flesh,

Faint and nauseas from utter disbelief and despair I fell to my knees,

           In the puddle, henchmen raped and pillaged nature before my eyes,

They stack the mutilated corpses, not content with mere death but further abuse,

           As the great beasts spew their foul excrement onto the earth,

It snakes down to the shore carried away on innocent waves for use

           Of heralding their message of destruction across the waters,

I tear my gaze from the horrific massacre played out before me,

           In that puddle of death and decay, and peer across that small divide,

Back to that welcoming glorious familial wonder, "This cannot be!!!

           How long must that ghastly drama have held my attention?!"

No longer stood the trees reaching to Heaven proud and green,

           Instead, barren, skeletons staggered on a bed of decaying leaves,

No longer crawling but receding groundcover, not abundant but lean,

           Divorced, orphaned, lovers scorned, humanity's message received.

 ~Lisa R.

My calling in life is education, teaching.  There is no more beautiful word!  I don't want to just teach...I want to inspire!

I love education.  I love sharing information, learning new things, discovering new philosophies (or just new to me).  I love listening to other people's stories whether it's through spoken words, poetry, writing, art, or actions.  I love helping others.  I love holding a door for someone, offering to help carry something heavy, working with a classmate or friend on homework or a sticky situation.  I love learning about other cultures.  I find cultures different from my own fascinating.  I love making someone laugh.  There is nothing better than seeing a person smile or laugh when you know they are having a hard time.  One moment of levity can mean the world at just the right moment. 

I'm going to be a teacher.  My minor is ESL (English as a Second Language).  We talk constantly about becoming a global community.  I want to be the person who can say, in all honesty, that I am doing everything in my power to insure that everyone has an equal shot at being successful in that global community.  I am taking Spanish.  I want to understand what my students are facing when they sit in a classroom and are having to try to figure out what is being said to them.  I want to know, first hand, what students are going though when they are trying to acquire a new language.  And I want my students to have the opportunity and ability to express themselves and be heard. 

If I could get paid to travel the world and learn the secrets of the World's cultures I would devote every moment of my life thereafter to erasing prejudice, confusion, and hate.  Everyday I would talk to different people from different backgrounds and find out who they are and where they came from.  I would immerse myself in their culture and try to understand it through their eyes.  I would act as a camera.  I love photography for this reason.  You get to look at something from the perspective of someone other than yourself.  You get to see what they are focusing on.  And if you talk to the photographer you find out what inspired them to think that particular sight was beautiful, sad, depressing, nostalgic, fascinating and should be shared.  That is how I would approach learning about others.  I would try to be their camera and focus on what they find important and then convey that to others to try to create some type of universal harmony or understanding.  I would try to get others to understand each other, to stand in each other's shoes.  I would try to inspire others to step outside themselves and look at the world with fresh eyes and opened hearts.  My days would be filled with human poetry, stories, and art.  Some of it would be joyful, some sorrowful but all of it would be real.